That's all I really ask. I just hate having mistakes I noted in the description pointed out again in the comments, and lord help you if you ask me a question that I answered already... Okay I won't be a dick, but I'll be like "read the description honey." I'm also not fond of getting canon lectures on fan art that I submitted prior to new information coming out. Or canon purist lectures in general. It's fan art; it won't always jive with canon. If that's a problem for you, stick to official art.
THINGS TO EXPECT:
-Fan art of many kinds!
-Lots of cussing and sexual innuendo.
-Stupid shit made for kicks.
|Stuff by my friends that I like, stuff that pertains to my specific fancies, and anything generally amazing or cool. |
I fave and run a lot. Deal with it.
1. Don't be a dick. You don't have to like what I do. I can't stop you from saying so, and far be it from me to restrict your right to free speech. However, if you insult me or go off about how bad my drawings are, I'm just going to ignore you. I don't have time for that shit.
2. Don't be demanding. You're not my boss; you're not paying me a salary; this isn't the office; you don't get to dictate my conduct and performance.
3. Don't steal anything. I'm not too paranoid about this, but I've had people repost my shit in the past and try to pass it off as their own, and it's extremely rude and childish. If you want to use my work or characters or ideas, I'm usually cool with it as long as you give me credit. See FAQs below for details.
Do you take requests?
NO. NO. No no no no. Would you ask a contractor to fix your roof for free? No, that would be rude. So is going around asking artists to give you free art.
Do you take commissions?
No. I don't have time, and I'd psych myself out trying to give it my A-game and I just don't need that stress.
Do you do art trades?
Not anymore. I'm working full-time and need all the time I can spare for my personal drawings.
Can I draw your character _______?
Be my guest! I'd be honoured. I appreciate being informed and if you have any questions, note me.
Can I include your character _______ in my written work?
Certainly, but please take the time to get to know them first. A drawing is easy, especially if they're just standing there. Writing is more involved and requires you to do characters' personalities justice. If anything is unclear you are more than welcome to note me for information. I'm always happy to help!
Can I post your drawing on _________?
That depends on what ________ is. Blogs and social network sites and private web sites I'm usually okay with as long as I'm credited for creating it. Sites like here or FA I take on a case by case basis. Usually if you want to post a drawing I did for you on your account, provided all credit to me is noted, I'll say yes. More than anything, I just like to be asked first. It shows courtesy.
Can I use your pictures for pose/character references?
Yes by all means! If using my work as a guide for poses or anatomy will help you, I'm more than happy to help fellow artists improve. I don't do any tutorials, and I'm far from an expert on anatomy, but I like to think I have a decent handle on the basics. If there's anything in my gallery that will assist you artistically, have at it. All I ask it that you don't outright trace or copy pictures and put them in your gallery without asking my permission.
As for character designs, if it's my OCs or fan-characters, then yeah, duh. Use my pictures. For characters in fandoms, just know that I tend to put my own personal spin on them. What you see in my drawings won't always match the official art.
Want to RP?
Oi... I'll admit, I get caught up in little comment thread RPs with my friends all the time. Official RPing, especially with people I don't know well, I'm pretty wary about. Feel free to ask, but if I politely decline don't take it personally.
Are you going to draw more of ________?
Every time I get asked this question, a baby bunny gets run over by a lawn mower. I draw what I feel like when I feel like it. I ride the tide of my inspiration and make very little attempt to steer one way or another. Sometimes, I stop drawing a theme forever. It's just how I am. I'm sorry if you're disappointed that I'm not drawing your favourite things anymore, but tough. I'm not going to force myself to draw things I don't feel like drawing to make random internet-goers momentarily happy. If you watched me for a theme I draw and I stop, I won't hunt you down with a pitchfork for un-watching me. There's no sense in having your inbox cluttered by crap you don't care to see.
Did you read/see my latest art/story/journal?
Every time I get a message like this, a funny-looking guy gets fed through a wood-chipper. Odds are, if I haven't made a comment or what-not, I haven't looked at it yet. You'll know when I do, if I do. Frankly people asking me this question makes the gremlin in me not want to look out of pure spite.
Insert any question on a deviation or journal that is clearly answered in the text above
Listen you lazy sod, if you don't want to take the time to read the description, then don't ask questions. Just comment on the obvious content or the execution of the piece. Or don't comment. I'd rather get no comment at all than be asked a question I've already answered.
| permanently for the foreseeable future.|
Trades I'm awaiting (just because I'm not accepting new ones doesn't mean y'all get a pass on what you owe me):
-- posted Aug. 4 2013 -- in touch
-- posted August 15 2013 -- TRADE IN STORAGE
-- posted December 21, 2013
-- posted February 16, 2014
-- posted March 1, 2014
|Just a list of blogs I read on a regular basis.|
Hyperbole and a Half: hyperboleandahalf.blogspot.com…
The Oatmeal: theoatmeal.com/
Sweaters For Days: jennytrout.com/
Something Short and Snappy: www.somethingshortandsnappy.bl…
Manifesto on Moral Mansex: manifestoonmoralmansex.tumblr.…
The Coquette: blog.thecoquette.net/
Dear Coquette: www.dearcoquette.com/advice
To My Husband: notestomyfuturehusband.com/
Fuck My Life: www.fmylife.com/
STFU Couples: www.stfucouples.com/ More for the comments than the entries
1.What is your true age?
2. Do you have any health problems?
Well aside from missing my left eye, no.
3. What is one thing you fear?
Anything going near my remaining eye. The idea of being completely sightless terrifies me. Also anyone who hurts children; it’s not so much a fear anymore, but if I hear of some sick fuck getting their kicks at the expense of a child’s well-being it brings out the worst in me!
4. What is your full name?
5. What is your real gender?
6. Are you hiding something?.
1. How would you describe your life right now?
It’s pretty good, especially compared to how I started. I have a decent amount of money, never mind that it’s ill-got. My family is still close to me; brother’s a mob boss so I get all kinds of perks! And there’s a certain lady who works at the police station with whom I share an attraction. Wait, how do I wink with one eye? Eh.
2. What is one thing you can't sleep without?
I can’t sleep with my eye-patch on. It’s just bothersome enough. The scarring and empty socket aren’t pretty, but whatever.
3. Are you creepy?
Not unless I’m deliberately trying to scare someone. Think of the Bear Jew from “Inglorious Bastards.”
4. Do you collect anything weird?
I collected rocks as a pup. Most of them I got rid of, except for the really neat-looking or special ones. I wouldn’t call it weird though.
5. Are you emo?
6. Do you ever cut yourself and why?
7. Ever think of suicide?
No. Although I would gladly take a bullet for my brother. That’s not the same thing though.
8. Do you ever cuss and swear?
Yeah. I’m not like Ferdinand whose every other word is ‘fuck,’ but I don’t censor myself.
1. Do you have any fetishes?
This is private right? No? Eurgh. Oh fine! I enjoy women penetrating me anally. Once that prostate gets bumped, WOW.
2. Have you ever had sex before?
Yes, many times.
3. Who do you want to eat out?
4. Do you masturbate?
Yeah, usually before bed. It helps me sleep.
5. How often do you participate in intercourse?
That depends on whether or not I have a partner. I have nothing against others having one-night-stands and the like, but it’s not for me. I like to know someone a little before I get in bed with her.
6. Ever had oral?
Yes. Both ways. Love ‘em.
7. Ever kissed anyone?
Uh yeah! Why is this not the first question? It would make some sense at the top of this section, but after all those others it just sounds stupid.
8. What things turn you on?
Bravery, intelligence, dark hair. I also have a soft spot for tattoos and piercing. My brother thinks it’s marring the body, but I see it as decorating. Unless it looks like a five-year-old did it of course…
9. What things turn you off?
Being a god-awful person. I’m not a saint myself, but some shit just crosses the line.
10. Ever fantasize about your crush?
Friends and Family
1. Do you honestly love your friends/family?
With all my heart.
2. Do you have a crush on any of your friends?
She’s more of a professional rival, being a cop and all.
3. Do you have a crush on any of your best friends?
NO I do not have a crush on Ferdinand. He has a thing for my brother though, which I find kind of amusing.
4. Are you always there for your family when they need you?
5. Have you ever been betrayed by a best friend?
6. Do you have any family who have no contact with you?
Well my parents are dead so we can’t very well contact them.
1. Are you straight?
Yes. I can appreciate a handsome man when I see one, but appreciation and attraction are two totally different things.
2. Are you bisexual?
No. I love it when women put things in my butt, but the idea of a guy doing it… no go.
3. Are you homosexual?
4. Are you pansexual?
5. Are you asexual?
6. Are you transgendered?
7. Are you queer?.
Your Future Life
1. Will you get married one day?
Eh, I’m open to it but I’m not fixed on the idea.
2. Where do you want to live?
I have a pretty nice place already.
3. Who do you wanna spend forever with?
4. Do you want kids some day?
I’d love to. Just one or two.
6. Where do you wanna have a honeymoon?
Brazil. I’d love to take a new wife to my country of origin.
Your Dreams and You
1. Do you ever write down any of your dreams?
No. I tend to forget half of them.
2. Do you ever have vivid nightmares?
3. Do you ever dream of yourself as someone else?
Not that I remember.
4. How many dreams have you had about your crush/someone you love deeply?
5. Do you ever dream of past events?
6. Are your family/friends ever in your dreams?
7. Where do most of your dreams take place (as in setting of the dream)?
Sometimes it’s around the city or at home; sometimes it’s back in Brazil when I was little.
8. What is one thing you have had the most dreams about? (besides a crush).
No dancing around it now. Getting my eye carved out and left to die by superstitious cunts who thought a maned wolf’s eye would bring them luck.
9. Who is mostly in your dreams every night?
Usually members of my family (even though Ferdinand and Isabelle aren’t related to me, I consider them family), but lately a certain feline has been appearing regularly.
10. Do you ever wake up crying from a dream?
The eyeball one makes me come close.
1. What are you doing at this moment?
Answering these questions and running updates on Henrique’s computer. The man is hopeless with technology.
2. Talking to anyone?
Cheetos… I forbid you to judge.
4. Doing something naughty?
Not right now. Resisting the urge to browse my brother’s porn files though…
“Are you sure you want to run program blah blah blah?” Yeah, I clicked on the update button, didn’t I?
7. What are you wearing?
A shirt and shorts. And boxers, duh.
Soundtrack of ‘Guardians of the Galaxy.’
You want me to draw you a picture?
Fuck yeah, I’m Da Vinci!
10. Where are you?
Still updating that computer... Later I’m going to the bar for some drinks.
I'm here for fun. My profession is paralegal work, and art is my hobby and escape from real life and all its stresses.|
If you're new to my page and have any questions, please take a moment to browse my FAQs (to the left); you may find what you're looking for!
Sit back, relax, and enjoy the ride.